Night falls and so do we as a voyeur moon paces before the stage, audience and director of our play, shaking her head: How could we forget that last line? Dawn of endless night sits heavy on our chests, the only thing between our racing hearts to remind us that we are not one. The stars move too but we have forgotten again, sweat in our eyes scattering the light of the sun who finally lifts his own eyes to the world. Exposed in morning’s light we remember what we are, and it is no less terrifying than before.

Most important question.

Does facebook somehow know the people I’ve had sex with, or do I just end up having sex with the same people I can’t seem to facebook-escape from?

This really has been such a bullshit semester but whenever I voice my upset I should try to remember where I was a year ago and realize how fucking lucky I am to constantly have people I love and who love me around me and how that has so rarely been the case throughout my life and how fucking good it is to be living the life I am living now even when it sometimes blows this hard.

1. Scribbled secret notebooks, and wild typewritten pages, for yr own joy
2. Submissive to everything, open, listening 
3. Try never get drunk outside yr own house 
4. Be in love with yr life 
5. Something that you feel will find its own form 
6. Be crazy dumbsaint of the mind 
7. Blow as deep as you want to blow 
8. Write what you want bottomless from bottom of the mind 
9. The unspeakable visions of the individual 
10. No time for poetry but exactly what is 
11. Visionary tics shivering in the chest 
12. In tranced fixation dreaming upon object before you 
13. Remove literary, grammatical and syntactical inhibition 
14. Like Proust be an old teahead of time
15. Telling the true story of the world in interior monolog
16. The jewel center of interest is the eye within the eye 
17. Write in recollection and amazement for yourself 
18. Work from pithy middle eye out, swimming in language sea 
19. Accept loss forever 
20. Believe in the holy contour of life 
21. Struggle to sketch the flow that already exists intact in mind 
22. Dont think of words when you stop but to see picture better 
23. Keep track of every day the date emblazoned in yr morning 
24. No fear or shame in the dignity of yr experience, language & knowledge 
25. Write for the world to read and see yr exact pictures of it 
26. Bookmovie is the movie in words, the visual American form 
27. In praise of Character in the Bleak inhuman Loneliness 
28. Composing wild, undisciplined, pure, coming in from under, crazier the better 
29. You’re a Genius all the time 
30. Writer-Director of Earthly movies Sponsored & Angeled in Heaven

spelling

My daughter plays on the floor
with plastic letters,
red, blue & hard yellow,
learning how to spell,
spelling,
how to make spells.

I wonder how many women
denied themselves daughters,
closed themselves in rooms,
drew the curtains
so they could mainline words.

A child is not a poem,
a poem is not a child.
There is no either / or.
However.

I return to the story
of the woman caught in the war
& in labour, her thighs tied
together by the enemy
so she could not give birth.

Ancestress: the burning witch,
her mouth covered by leather
to strangle words.

A word after a word
after a word is power.

At the point where language falls away
from the hot bones, at the point
where the rock breaks open and darkness
flows out of it like blood, at
the melting point of granite
when the bones know
they are hollow & the word
splits & doubles & speaks
the truth & the body
itself becomes a mouth.

This is a metaphor.

How do you learn to spell?
Blood, sky & the sun,
your own name first,
your first naming, your first name,
your first word.